Hello, Internet. While you may have logged on to read Pudge’s thoughts you are in for something different today. My name is Shakespear, and Pudge has been gracious enough to invite me to contribute to his blog. Don’t be alarmed, Pudge will continue to share his thoughts here but now, you’ll be hearing from me too on occasion.
I’m posting today because, after watching Doug Walker, aka the Nostalgia Critic, I wanted to give reviewing a try myself. When Pudge offered to let me post here, I thought it would be the perfect opportunity. I’d be interested in hearing what you think, so, through whatever means you wish, let me know what you think. With no further ado, let’s get started with The Secret of NIMH 2, Timmy to the Rescue. 
To properly bash this pile of unnecessary backwash, I must first talk about Don Bluth and the original Secret of NIMH. Don Bluth worked with Disney for a portion of his career, but famously left in 1979. He began his own studio, and since then created some of the best animated movies of all time, such as “The Land Before Time”, “An American Tail”, and, of course, “The Secret of NIMH”, which is considered by many, including me, to be not only his strongest work, but the best animated film of all time. It was grown up, had a dark atmosphere, and the animation was top notch, as is all of Bluth’s work. Not to mention that our heroine, Mrs. Brisby, is a believable, well developed character, and broke the clichés of the day. You know, plucky warrior comes in and fulfills his destiny. Bluth had the foresight to keep the focus on believable characters.
Oh, you may have noticed I called her Mrs. Brisby, while later I call her Frisby. See, in the original book, the name was Frisby, but they changed it in the first movie because Frisby sounded too much like Frisbee, the toy. Not that important, but an interesting bit of trivia.
The plot of NIMH is based on the book “Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH”. Both told the story of Mrs. Frisby, a widowed mouse, seeking the rats to aid her in saving her family. The rats can help because they’ve been altered by NIMH (the National Institute of Mental Health), along with eleven mice, to be super intelligent. However, nine mice died in the ventilation system during the escape. The only ones left were a mouse named Mr. Ages and Jonathan Frisby. The rats only escape NIMH with the help of Jonathan, Mrs. Frisby’s husband, who was small enough to unlatch the grate on the other end. Jonathan died, however, in service to the rats. The rats feel as if they owe Jonathan, and by extension, his wife, a debt, so they help. The plot is far more intricate and complicated so see it if you can, but my aim is to review the sequel, so let’s begin.
The film starts with a recap of the events of the first movie, ending with Justin, the new leader of the rats, saying that they’re leaving the rose bush they’ve been living in to go to Thorn Valley
The story begins with two young mice racing around, having tethered two rabbits, holding onto the reins and sliding on walnut shells. Yeah, this is the movie’s first problem: the tone is far too light for a sequel to NIMH. The original was dark and epic. This one is… not. It’s said that MGM thought the first movie was too scary for kids, so they toned down the action, the danger, and the fear the characters felt. You know, all the things that made it good.
Anyway, Timmy, the younger of the two, with a voice like a cheese grater, loses control of his walnut –never thought I’d say that –and crashes. His brother Martin, instead of stopping to see if he’s ok, continues racing, shouting, “See ya, Timmy!” What a good example he sets. Leaving his younger brother alone in the forest to fend for himself to win a stupid race. How endearing. *eye roll *
Anyway, Timmy decides to take a shortcut, but accidently ends up in a trap. Martin finally comes after him and helps him get out, but not before berating him for going off the path. It turns out that the traps were set by scientists from NIMH who are now looking for the escaped rats. Anyway, we learn that Timmy is apparently the son Nicodemus meant when he made his prediction. How they know this or why, we never learn. Great. Further bad exposition reveals that Timmy is leaving for Thorn Valley
The next character introduced is Jeremy, an idiotic and clumsy crow. His voice is done by Dom DeLuise, a very funny person, but even he can’t spruce up this horrible script. Anyway, we get more exposition, some of which we already established (Proofreading, what’s that?), but the main thing to take away are Martin gives Timmy his slingshot, Martin tells Jeremy that Thorn Valley is “South by South by South”, based on what landmark or map I have no idea, and Mrs. Brisby tells Timmy that if he gets in trouble, find the Great Owl, an ancient owl that was featured in the first movie. However, in the first movie, Mrs. Brisby went to the Owl against her better judgment, because owls eat mice. Now, however, Mrs. Brisby is telling her son, who is apparently the only hope to stop NIMH, to go to him. What, is the Owl a vegetarian now?
After Jeremy takes off, Auntie shrew, a bitchy shrew from the first film, says how lucky Timmy is and how great Nicodemus was. I mention this because Auntie Shrew hated the rats in the last movie, but is now singing the praises of one. The attention to detail is staggering, isn’t it? This is also a prime example of the stilted dialogue among minor characters. It seems as though there was some thought put in to the major character’s dialogue but little effort was made on the dialogue of the more minor characters. If you’re going to write a screenplay, you should make sure each character leaves an impression, even bit players. In this movie no character has, not even the main ones. Martin angst’s about how it should have been him as he storms off. Gee, could this be that technique of storytelling called… foreshadowing? D8
As Jeremy flies toward Thorn Valley Thorn Valley
And on that note, this brings to light another mistake. The rats of NIMH are way too bright and sunny here. In the first film, they were shrouded in mystery, they were bigger that our protagonists, and were incredibly intimidating. Now, they’re like the effing Smurfs, just hairier.
Anyway, after this song, we are presented with the basic idea that Timmy doesn’t think his ideas through. Hey, like the writers! It’s always nice to see people using personal experience in their work. Now Timmy gets his own song. Oh good, because we all love his speaking voice, just picture his singing voice. Ugh. However, despite Young Timmy’s poor singing voice, the song itself is decent, at least. It’s basically a fast forward to when Timmy is a 17 year old, with a small stop at 13. In the song, he talks about how he never knew his father and how he’ll be a legend himself. I might be overanalyzing this, but I think that this has at least some depth. But here’s an interesting thing. When Timmy (or Tim as he calls himself now) sings this song as a child, he seems to resent his father. His outlook isn’t much better as a 13 year old either. However, when we see him as a 17 year old, he seems to have gotten over it, and is singing about how he’ll always have his father. Not only is it a total turn around, this is a bit of character development I thought would have been better if it had been integrated into the plot. However, as a testament to poor writing, it’s rushed through in this song and never brought up again. Another example of why this film should not have been made.
Let’s take a moment, however, to examine the animation. In the first film, the animation was slick, well thought-out, and very fluid. The colors were subtle, the environments dark, and the characters moved in a believable fashion, if that makes sense. The animation here, however, is below average, even by normal standards, let alone the precedent set by Bluth's work.
Anyway, you might be wondering what B-list celebrity they got to do the voice of Tim.
That’s right, Ralph Macchio. The Karate Kid is now a pubescent mouse. I hope he fired his agent.
Anyway, Tim is asked by Justin to help with a scavenging mission to a small general store. Wasn’t the point of going to Thorn Valley so that they wouldn’t HAVE to steal from humans? Continuity, who needs it? The grand mission Tim envisioned, however, is reduced to lookout duty. Frustrated, he throws away the whistle he was given to signal if the dog that guards the store, Killer (how original), shows up. Soon he hears a noise by a trash can and goes to investigate, actually BREAKING the whistle underfoot. This scene is so ridiculous and pointless that I am having trouble describing it.
But no time for that, we have a new character! Oh good, because the dialogue wasn’t dumb enough. She’s Jenny McBride, a mouse about Tim’s age. They seem friendly, which obviously means we’ve found our love interest. I’m a sucker for a good romance. I wish there was one in this movie. However, the plot comes knocking as Tim has accidently woken up Killer. The following “action” scene is rather uninteresting. The only purpose it serves is that we find out Jenny can read. This is apparently a big deal, or it would be if I cared, as it means that she has a connection to NIMH.
Back at Thorn Valley we find out what that connection is. Remember when I said that the rats escaped but nine mice died? Apparently they didn’t. They landed in the basement and had to wait until the injured ones healed. That’s right, the writers resurrected the Lost Nine to make all the kiddies feel better. Not only that, but they flubbed up and made it the Lost Six instead of Nine. I’d say this is a rather large oversight, but it’s all par for the course at this point. But before the Lazarus mice could leave, they were captured by a man called Dr. Valentine. Apparently, Jenny is the daughter of two of the Lost Six (Lost Nine, moron), hence the reading. Things in NIMH are apparently worse than ever, and Valentine is planning something for the full moon, which is only days away. Jenny came to Thorn Valley to get help. The Counsel apparently needs a day to decide, because we cut to next day. Pointless dialogue ensues between Jenny and Tim, something about worrying about family. When the rats come back, however, they decide that it’s too much of a risk. It could expose Thorn Valley, and its only defense is secrecy. Jenny tries to leave in a huff, but is detained by the rats because she knows too much about them. Good, lock her up, and Tim too! End the movie here.
Anyway, on to more crap as Jenny tries to escape right in front of Tim. Hey, Tim, shouldn’t you be, I don’t know, STOPPING HER?! But no time for logic as Tim asks how she even knows about Thorn Valley. Apparently there was a mouse in the cage next to hers who knew that Thorn Valley existed, and that it was South by South by South. Tim is struck by a realization. The mouse she’s talking about must be Martin. He pulls out a letter from his mother (that we never see delivered to him) that says he disappeared. So the two escape and head to NIMH in- get this –a hot air balloon made of a bench and some balloons. Are you really surprised? However, this flying doesn’t last long as the two are attacked by a hawk. Please let them die.
But no, the hawk goes for the balloon instead, and only after taking out two balloons does it attack. Yes, because a highly evolved killing machine like a hawk would attack balloons when there are two juicy mice right there. Imagine the research they did for this. Must have taken all of five minutes. Anyway, they go down and are saved from the hawk by a caterpillar blowing into a log. Funny thing is, the sound the log makes isn’t remotely frightening. Oh well. As Jenny and Tim are now lost, Tim says they should find the Great Owl. The caterpillar overhears, and tells them he can hook them up. However, the Great Owl don’t work cheap, so they need payment. However, Jenny uses the negotiating technique of… stepping on his foot. Guantanamo Bay should be taking notes *sigh*. This works, however, so Tim goes up to see the Great Owl. Now, here’s what the Great Owl looked like in the first movie.
Now THAT’S intimidating. However, this is the owl in the new movie.
As if this weren’t bad enough, the other animals buy it. What’s WORSE is we get a horrible song so catchy it’s in my head as I type. Oh, not to mention a conga line and more contrived romance between our two main idiots. Say hello to the bottom of the barrel, people. Anyway, Jeremy and the stupid caterpillar are found out as phonies and it looks for a moment as if we will be rid of them. But no, Jeremy takes off with the mousey morons in tow. As Jeremy flies off, Tim gives him directions to NIMH. As a testament to Jeremy’s intelligence, he has no idea he’s heading to NIMH until he’s told this. Aren’t crows supposed to be smart?
This barrage of Jeremy I’m seeing reminds me of another thing wrong with this movie: the jokes aren’t funny. I laughed at maybe one joke, and it involved implying Tim should go off and die in a trap. Only the idea of the main character dying can bring me any joy from this movie. You see the problem here? I find myself rolling my eyes or shaking my head more than laughing.
Once Jeremy finds out that they’re flying towards the infamous NIMH, he panics and falls to the ground. Pratfalls are good comedy! *sigh*. Jeremy and the caterpillar leave the two mice to go alone into NIMH (again, great role models). Once we’re in NIMH, however, it’s a bit unimpressive. Once again I must make a comparison to the last movie. In the first movie, NIMH looked like an ordinary research lab. However, NIMH was creepy because we saw it from the point of view of the rats. They were afraid of it, so we were afraid too. However, now we’re seeing it for ourselves, and that right there is a bad thing. Also, they made NIMH look like Frankenstein’s castle, inside and out. It sucks all originality or credibility from it. It brings it down to the level of all other kids' movies.
As they explore NIMH, they find that Valentine has made all the other scientists think they’re dogs. Again, shaking my head. They avoid some giant rat guards (OUE EEE OUE), but run into a rat-like figure. Tim attacks (yeah, that’ll help) but it turns out it’s Justin and some other rats from Thorn Valley. Apparently, the Thorn Valley rats changed their minds and decided to get the Lost Six. What does this mean? It means that all the scenes between Tim and Jenny’s escape and this one are ENTIERLY POINTLESS!!!!
I mean come on! Why on God’s green earth did you have the two of them run away if you were going to have the rats go to NIMH anyway?! For that matter, why have the rats say no in the first place?! Wouldn’t it have made more sense for them to say they would help, but then tell Tim and Jenny they couldn’t come? You could still have them sneak off and be all rebellious, and you avoid making the millions of frames you just drew TOTALLY SUPERFLUIS!!!!! You basically just turned a good half hour of your movie into FILLER! THINK, PEOPLE!!!!!!
Oh well, we still have movie to go, so I’ll pull out the fork I jabbed into my arm to deaden the pain. Timmy is again asked to be lookout, but blows it off YET AGAIN. Didn’t you learn your lesson last time, you little moron?! Anyway, because he was an idiot, everyone, including the Lost Six, is captured by two cats which Valentine obviously altered and brought to him. So here we are face to face with Dr. Frankenst- er, Valentine. However, someone throws a ball and it turns out Valentine’s a dog now too. So, who’s the real mastermind behind all this?
If you said Martin, no freaking duh. However, you’ll never guess who does his voice.
Yup! Eric Idle, isn’t that strange? He’s much too funny to be here. I guess NIMH also gives you the voice of Monty Python actors. As it turns out, Martin’s intelligence was enhanced beyond the boost he got from his father being a mouse of NIMH. However, rather than the disturbing injections from the last movie, we get electric shock treatment. Great, more Nerfing of the original. Long story short, Martin got so smart he outsmarted Valentine, took over NIMH, and now plans to invade Thorn Valley. Oh no! I wish I cared.
However, does Martin just tell us this? No, he sings it, of course! Granted, this song is made better by the epicness of Idle, but like DeLuise, even he can’t salvage the poor writing in this stinker. Martin offers the basic “I am your father” speech, but our “hero” says no. Martin puts him in a cage that just kinda… pops out of the floor (don’t think about it too much, your brain will hemorrhage) and tells him he’ll watch Thorn Valley go down. Jenny tries to stop him, but Martin takes her away so he can zap her and make her his queen. Good, maybe she’ll become Connie Booth.
Martin skulks off with Jenny and orders his goons to lock up his friends. Once he’s gone, we get- Oh, come on! Another song?! Do we really need another one so soon? Not to mention the angst-o-meter readings on this one are off the charts. The good news is, the song is short. The bad news is, the movie isn’t over. That annoying caterpillar (whose name is Cecil, but do you really care?) lowers himself into the cage… somehow, claiming that every hero needs a sidekick. Oh good, the last cliché under our belt. Cecil says something about a key, which- of course –gives Tim the idea to use a key the rats gave him as a symbol (of what I don’t know) to remove the bolts from the cages hinges. In a nut shell, Tim and Jenny knock out Martin, give Martin’s army the wrong directions (North by North by North, which STILL makes no sense), blow up NIMH and get a hero’s welcome. They cure Martin (Eric idle: Where's my bloody check?), and Tim gets himself a statue. But not forgetting the obligatory kiss from Tim and Jenny. Aww, how emotionally lacking.
So, what can one say about this movie? A lot, as I have demonstrated. However, let’s break it down. The writing is awful, the direction couldn’t be worse, the animation is laughable, and let’s faces it, the only reason it was made was to cash in on the popularity of the first movie. If that was the intent, why did you make it 16 YEARS AFTER THE FIRST ONE? Whatever. Thankfully, there are three things that minimize its damage. First, Don Bluth had NOTHING to do with it, so his reputation is saved. Two, it never had a theatrical release, so it can fade into obscurity, where It belongs. Three, it is so detached and unlike the first movie, when I think of The Secret of NIMH 2, The Secret of NIMH doesn’t come to mind. So while this movie should never have existed, at the very least the first film is intact, as is Don Bluth. At least until “Rock-a-Doodle”, but what’cha gonna do?
Bottom line, avoid Secret of NIMH 2. However, if you haven’t already, go find The Secret of NIMH, and watch it.
Well, I’ve enjoyed connecting with you about this movie. Again, my name is Shakespear and I am glad for the chance to give you a heads up on the Secret of NIMH. It would be great to hear from you so drop me a line if you liked this review or even if you didn’t. See you next time, hopefully.
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